The Flash

I had one of those moments today when a conversation caught me off guard and reminded me of how much I still hurt from the miscarriage. I was talking to one of our contractors who mentioned that he had not been in the office this morning because his wife took him with her to the doctor’s office. She’s pregnant, in her first trimester, and had started spotting. They went in for an ultrasound and saw the flash on the screen showing the baby’s heartbeat. At that mention, my heart began to ache because I remembered when Sweetie and I had that amazing experience watching our own little one’s heartbeat flashing on the screen. I had never experienced something so wonderful as that day, especially since we also heard the heartbeat for the first time. It is now particularly painful to hear someone else talking about having that moment because the baby whose heartbeat I heard so vividly (and can still hear) is not here and never will be. I still miss my baby.

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