A few months ago, I gave up reading newspapers online. Instead, I opted just to get the headlines for two delivered to my Google Reader: The New York Times and the Washington Post. I needed a filter so that I wouldn’t go through so much stuff that just upset me. For the most part, it’s worked out really well. Until today, that is.
I was flipping through the Google Reader and saw that Lori had posted, and although I had lots of work to do, I clicked on over (she always cracks me up and who doesn’t need a laugh in the morning?). Funny story about SATC (yes, Charlotte, some girls do get pregnant after they decide to adopt, but most don’t!) and then, wham, I saw it. A story about infertility in the New York Times featuring PJ! I couldn’t click fast enough.
I can’t explain why it was that in reading about infertility, and PJ’s experiences in particular, in print made so much of an impact on me. It was if we, as a community, had gone viral, legit, out and proud, whatever you want to call it. I listened to the six voices of women with infertility and I found myself nodding at each one – yep, thought that, that too, oh yea! that one! There was a validation there that I didn’t even know I was looking for. The idea that six women were willing to talk about this in public and let it all hang out for the lack of a better term, gave me a certain sense of optimism that some day, more people will understand how hard this.
My optimism was curbed almost immediately by the insensitive-bordering-on-outright-dumb comments that some people posted in response. I shared some of them with Mr. X and he just shook his head, and like the good Libertarian that he is, declared that they were entitled to their opinion. I was less sanguine.
Still, our voices carry. I had forgotten how far they can go. Hopefully, more people will see how hard this all is even if they themselves are not afflicted and recognize that all we ask is to have the same right as everyone else to have a child.
[Mrs. X exits her soapbox. Film at 11.] image: circulating
(Note to my friends who have not dealt personally with infertility but who read this blog: this post was not about you!)
In other news, I must be a popular girl. I have been tagged not once, not twice, not even three times – but four times! And, they’re not even the same meme. I’ve already used up most of my existential energy this evening, so I will attack the easier of the two tonight: you in six questions courtesy of seriously? and loribeth.
1) What were you doing 10 years ago? Well, I had just graduated from college not even a month before and went home with my parents. I know, big dork, but I knew I wanted to take a year off after college and veg before diving into grad school. So, I was painfully adjusting to living back until the parental roof while trying to find a meaningful (and decent paying) job. Many growing pains ensued.
2) What are 5 things on your to-do list today? Today is almost tomorrow, so I’ll list tomorrow’s to-do’s in no particular order: put an iron choke hold on my work to-do list so that I don’t feel so freakin’ far behind, pick up Sweetie’s dry cleaning, don’t forget my dinner date up the street, go to the vet to get more pet food, and try to finish the scrapbook I’m making about how I made the quilt for my best friend’s new baby.
3) List some snacks you enjoy: Almonds. I need my protein in the afternoon to keep going!
4) What would you do with a billion dollars?: start a foundation to promote conservation, pet adoption and my other pet causes. Fund scholarships for kids who wouldn’t otherwise go to college. Invest the rest and live off of the interest – maybe buy a house in Australia, I love Sydney, but otherwise not change much in my daily routine!
5) List the places you have lived: I have to be kind of vague here so I don’t blow my intricately laid cover. But, I’ll say that I’ve only lived in three states in my entire life, in two different time zones.
6) List the jobs you’ve had: a babysitter, library assistant (book shelver – I loved it), resident assistant in college, membership coordinator at a gym, federal employee, clerk at art supply store, teaching assistant, and now my current job, of which all I will say is that I get paid to play with words.