I’m Special

In my visit with Dr. Salsa today to go over the bloodwork that I had for immune testing and the Clo.mid Challenge, I learned that I am truly ‘special’ although not for behavioral issues.  I’m special because I am in the 1% of recurrent miscarriers who have chromosomally abnormal embyros but neither partner has a chromosomal abnormality. 1 percent. I’m shocked that the percentage is so low.  I had really thought it was more prevelant than that.  Can you imagine if I played the lottery with these odds and my luck?  I could be a millionaire several times over. 

On the other side of the statistics, though, I still have a 76% chance of actually having a living, screaming, squalling infant at the end of a nine month tunnel.  As I told Dr. Salsa, it is literally inconceivable to me right now that this would happen.  He knows of what I speak – he and his wife had three miscarriages in a row before number 4 stuck. 

Other good news: no immune issues and a nice, normal FSH.  Smack me, though, for wanting something definitive – preferably curable – as to why I cannot carry a child to term (other than bad luck). 

We’re on track for an IVF in March 2009.  It seems far away, but I know it will be here before I blink. I hope I’m ready by then.

8 thoughts on “I’m Special

  1. It must be so frustrating when test results don’t give any answers. But I’m glad the results are good. And a 76% chance of success is fantastic!

    BTW – you’re right; March will be here before you know it.

    Mrs. X: you are absolutely right that 76% is awesome. Thanks for the reminder!

  2. what great news!

    i totally understand about not being able to even imagine being pregnant — totally counter-intuitive since we’ve been trying to make a baby for so f*&^ing long!

    Mrs. X: it is counterintuitive, but you keep hitting a wall enough, you expect a wall.

  3. So that’s 76% without PGD? Not too shabby…

    Mrs S

    Mrs. X: no PGD – in fact, Dr. Salsa has steered us away from that. 76% I’ll take. Besides, it matches my birth year.

  4. No matter how good the statistics may be, it is incredibly hard to place our trust in them – particularly when past experience has taught us differently.

    After all you’ve been through, the thought of another cycle must be very daunting, Mrs X. I hope that, next time round, the odds work out in your favour.

    Mrs. X: It’s funny – I have a lot more faith in the statistics that put me in the minority of bad news than I do in the statistics that put me in the majority of good news. I got burned twice on that one.

  5. I’m not sure whether to congratulate you on your fantastic odds of having a baby or sympathise with your frustration at having no concrete answers.

    Perhaps I’ll just do both.

    Congrats!

    That sucks.

    Mrs. X: Hallmark should make a card like this. LOL.

  6. It really is better to know, isn’t it? I wish I knew why our embryos won’t stick. We’re assuming it’s male factor, but if we manage to make progress there, who’s to say it isn’t me?

    Congrats on your “luck”. Let’s just keep rolling the dice, eh?

    Mrs. X: It’s hard to realize that even if you find one thing wrong and fix it, it still might not mean that the process will work. That is very frustrating. But, if you don’t try, you don’t have any chance to succeed. I still have the desire to roll the dice.

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