Better Late Than Never

It’s been awhile, hasn’t it?

Part of the reason is that there hasn’t been much news.  The other part is that I’ve had a hard time feeling like it is ok to talk normal things about my pregnancy.  Maybe I’m just a particularly sensitive person, but those posts by other bloggers usually got me right in the gut with the bright cheery discussions of nurseries, etc. that seemed to my wounded infertile mind as if they had forgotten the struggle to get there entirely and those who were still struggling.

Upon reflection, I understood that the part that bugged me was not the details (which frankly, I found interesting), but the posts that read as if they were written by a normal, happy, fertile pregnant lady.  The change always seemed so abrupt as if to say, “I’m cured!”  Meanwhile, I wasn’t.  (Why yes – I do have a problem with envy.)

I’m not cured.  I don’t think I ever will be.  But, I do feel that it is ok for me to share some details.  So, here goes.

If you are in a bad place right now, I’d strongly suggest that you move along.  I understand – trust me. I really, really do. I won’t hold it against you.  Feel free to come back later or block me entirely.  Do whatever you need to do.

I am officially in the third trimester.  That one is still sinking in.  Totally shocking, although at the time, it seemed as if the second trimester dragged somewhat toward the end there.  I look as if I have swallowed a basketball and it certainly feels like that when I bend over, which I am doing less and less.  Mr. X is still amazed at how hard the belly feels.  He continues to press his ear to it and I’ve warned him that one of these days, the kid is going to kick him.  So far, he’s been lucky. Little B gave the OB’s doppler a nice karate chop a few weeks ago.

I did my glucose screening and passed.  I studied very hard.  It means no gestational diabetes and no three hour test (which if I had to do, I was totally going to make a song about to the tune of Gilligan’s Island).

And, lastly – but certainly not least – I think it is high time to share with you just what we’re having.  I could make you guess – after all, you have a 50/50 chance of getting it right, but this is one of those times where I’d much rather just say it.

It’s a little Mr. X.  Yep, a boy – and boy was he not shy about sharing.  As if it wasn’t obvious enough, the amnio did confirm this.  We were not all that surprised, frankly, because there has not been a female born of Mr. X’s patrilineal line since 1932.  And, if it had been a girl, we would have been worried about Turner’s given our prior history. Yet another infertility parting gift.

So, there you have it.  We’re still taking it one day at a time and that is suiting us just fine.

16 thoughts on “Better Late Than Never

  1. Congratulations – little boys are awesome!!! Glad things are going so well! Can’t believe you are in the 3rd trimester already – its flying past! B xxx

  2. Yay! I can relate to the boy thing, not just because I have one, but my husband’s side is filled with men and no female offspring. In fact, I think the reason my MIL loves me so much is I was the first daughter-in-law to the family, and finally upped the estrogen quotient.

    I’m glad everything has been uneventful for you. Do try (a little) to take in the joy right now.

  3. Congratulations on your little boy! I had a hard time blogging when pregnant as well. I was just scared the whole time and like you I most certainly did not feel cured. I’m glad everything has been going well and I hope the third trimester flies by. All the best in the new year.

  4. A little Mr. X! How wonderful. So glad that there is nothing to report, other than that good news.

    (I have to say that I think many pregnant infertile women are so cheerful not because they’ve been cured, but because they’re trying to ward off the jinx. Positive thinking and all that.)

  5. It’s good to hear from you again. I have to agree – what gets me about pregnant IFers’ posts is the sunshine and roses, as if they hadn’t been through hell, and didn’t know that infertiles have a scary risk of miscarriage. Doesn’t mean I don’t want them to enjoy their baby showers and whatnot, but when it becomes ALL “look at the cute onesies!” and no more recognition of what the pregnancy means to their lives (outside of there being a baby coming, which seems sort of obvious to me), then I feel as though we’re just in different worlds.

    So, in short, I’m very happy that you and the small one are still healthy, even more delighted about the GD and everything going positively, and feel as though your view of the world – pregnancy and all – still makes a lot of sense to me. Not that you’re under any obligation to make sense to me or anyone else (other than you), but just in case you were wondering.

  6. I’ve read about you from a distance for quite some time and was captivated by your story. Little did I know, I would soon follow you down the path of infertility…but for different reasons. I am overjoyed that you are on your way to your happy ending. Congrats on your little boy. I can’t wait til you meet him. Enjoy every minute. You’ve certainly earned it!

  7. So glad you haven’t had any more “parting gifts” or “thanks for playing!” from the IF fairy, that you’re healthy and relatively sane and bidding your time until the big event. I found the last trimester the most annoying, or at least the last few weeks of it. In part because I wasn’t cured and I still couldn’t quite believe things would go well… but they did.

    Have you been thinking about your birth at all? Or does that just feel too scary/nutty/whathaveyou?

  8. It’s perfectly understandable that you feel this way. I totally get it. I have never actully suffered from I/F, but I have lost both my pregnancies. The happy sunshine and roses stories get to me too. But congrats on 3rd trimester, and that you’re having a boy. 🙂 Congrats.

  9. I was wondering where you went to. I’m glad things are going well with Mr. X. junior and may he karate chop his way into the world very soon! You know, as I’ve learned, having a kid is immensely gratifying, but it does not obliterate infertility from your headspace. Counting down the days til I brought my little one home, I can’t say I felt the joyful expectation that others assumed I felt.

  10. I have also missed your posts, but I am glad to hear that things are moving forward. Congratulations on reaching the third trimester! Thank you for sharing the news with us that you are expecting a little Mr. X! How Exciting! My best thoughts and good wishes are with you!

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