Taking Care of No. 1

Hello, there, Internets. It’s been a while.  Nothing crazy going on, no hecticness about the weeks these days, just lots of things that need doing – like putting the kiddos’ laundry in the dryer before I retire for the evening lest Rex have no shorts to go to school tomorrow. While I’m sure he would love to show everyone his Cars underwear with Mater on his booty, I’m guessing it would be pretty distracting.  Before I did that, however, I wanted to stop in and say hello and let you know that I’m actually doing pretty ok, considering.

We’ve been in Louisiana now almost a full year and the ache of missing our friends and life in Texas has begun to fade.  Moving to our current house and neighborhood really helped with this because it is alot like our old neighborhood in Texas. Plenty of large, mature trees, a great neighborhood, and a house that we feel we can make our own.  The first neighborhood we moved into looked like post-apocalyptic Louisiana with scrubby palm trees and spindly pine trees.  Our current neighborhood is the Amazon forest in comparison.  We have a babysitter next door, a kid to mow our lawn lives down the street and Rex has two new little friends across the way. All I need is a Mah Jongg group, and I’ll be set! Speaking of sets, I also just bought a vintage 1940s Mah Jongg set with bakelite tiles and racks that I can’t wait to get my hands on to play with.

I still miss our Golden boy, but I’m knowing more and more that we did the right thing at the right time.  Still, I miss him something awful.

I’ve started in therapy again, after my last go round to address some basic non-infertility issues was rudely interrupted with my pregnancy with Little Miss and our move. My new person is also a mom. In my days of infertility therapy, I would have only accepted a therapist who was a mom if she had been through infertility. I wanted the tiger with the stripes. Now, I just want someone who has been close enough to the toddler and newborn years to remember them and offer constructive coping mechanisms for when Rex asks me to repeat something for the third time in 5 minutes.

She’s also helping me to be much more focused on marveling at Rex rather than losing my patience with him.  I’m still relatively new to the concept of coping with something by looking at it differently – rather than trying to change it.  It certainly makes accepting things as they are a lot easier. It also helps me appreciate what a wonderful little boy Rex is – even when he is driving me batshit insane.  Funny, his whining has seemed to decrease exponetially as well.

Finally, I’m listening to what my mind and body have been trying to tell me for a while: if I don’t have time to myself EACH AND EVERYDAY I will be a blubbering, patience-losing, physically and mentally drained person. Me time is not a luxury, it’s a necessity.  I don’t necessarily need to take more of it per day, I am focusing on really enjoying the amount that I have.  That means not using it to fold laundry, empty the dishwasher or tidy up.  It does mean sitting on the porch swing, reading a book or just listening to good music.

There you have it. I promise not to take two months before posting again.